By MPP Bobbi Ann Brady
We often say we live in a civilized society, which means one that is well regulated, orderly, and built upon systems aimed to ensure we all feel safe and secure in our daily lives. Disagreements are inevitable, but they are meant to be handled with respect, open communication and a shared commitment to the greater good. Yet today, so many I speak to question, and worry, whether we are truly living up to that ideal, as the tone of public discourse grows sharper and civility in politics increasingly feels like it is optional.
In December, I attended the annual convention of the Council of State Governments in Chicago. Fittingly, much of the discussion centred on the importance of public service conducted with civility. During the week, Illinois State Senator Elgie Sims launched the Service with Civility Project, an initiative aimed at reminding elected officials that how we conduct ourselves matters just as much as the policies we debate. I was proud to take the pledge to lead with civility, serve with intention, and recognize others who choose to do the same. However, civility does not mean the absence of accountability because a healthy democracy depends on it.
We can all do better, and none of us are perfect. Every one of us, whether in public office or participating as citizens, has moments where patience is tested or we say things we regret. Acknowledging our imperfections is not weakness; it is an opportunity to commit to higher standards.
As I continue to stand up for democracy, it is equally important to speak out against the bad behaviour that is eroding our society and democracy. Disrespect and hostility often dwarf the public good, leaving talented and integral policymakers frustrated, and in some cases, running for the exit.
Sadly, history bears a long and tragic list of political assassinations. Individuals who have taken the lives of prominent figures with the intent to intimidate and shock. This violence is usually met with disbelief and horror, yet, alarmingly, there are those who celebrate with glee. Closer to home, we do not have to look far to see the modern echo of this violence – our phones and computers are filled with keyboard warriors who spend their days engaging in word assassinations. And while these assaults might not involve physical harm, they are meant to chip away at one’s character. We see this on some local social media pages, which are established with the intent to destroy someone.
I took some women by surprise on International Women’s Day when I spoke candidly about what it is like to be in public life. I was not looking for sympathy because I have a thick skin, but I wanted to remind the group that toughness was never meant to be a license for cruelty. There is a profound difference between fierce debate and personal harm. For example, I’ve had a local journalist label me a ‘paramour’ online. In 2022, we saw the wife of a former mayor celebrating an election result with a ‘ding dong the witch is dead’ comment. This is unacceptable regardless of whom is being victimized.
While attending various events, I have witnessed another female local representative causing a disturbance by making unflattering remarks and being openly disrespectful and disruptive. Such conduct is not only unprofessional, but embarrassing, and a reminder poor behaviour by those in office reflects on us all.
When civility is abandoned, it is not just decorum that suffers but our ability to govern effectively, build trust and inspire the very people who should be in leadership positions. Social media is not going away so we need to choose to lead the way and call out behaviour that puts drama ahead of depth.
Bobbi Ann Brady is the MPP for Haldimand-Norfolk